It's about 11pm Sunday night. I have what feels like a hundred things on my mind as I sit down to update my Things to Do list for tomorrow and the rest of the new week. Yes, that means I'm still not doing so well on that anxiety-about-THE-List thing.
On the foremost of my mind is a niggling worry I don't have a topic to post about tomorrow for my GraceLaced Mondays linkup. I must have whispered to God that I needed some help, because the answer always seems to hit me about two seconds afterwards. I didn't have a topic to talk about. That was going to be my post?
...And then I realized, that's why He suggested it. Because I didn't have a topic to talk about.
Our pastor was home sick today , so two of the deacons took turns. Kevin spoke tonight, and he's been with this church forever! His extended family is, in fact, the backbone of our little, white, country church of about 35 or so members. He joked about no one being there because they didn't want to hear him speak (you know they were home watching THAT game), but in the end, it was him that brought home what I'm really talking about tonight...me. He talked about worry, but he mentioned something that brought this verse to mind. Since I already knew that worry has been a problem lately, I knew this sermon was going to be something I needed to hear.
The NIV version of Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight."
I, like many Christians, have a really hard time letting God be in control. Even of the little things. I know in my head that I should be taking the time to study my Bible at home, that I should make more time for prayer, should be shining the light of Jesus Christ in my every action. However, in reality, none of that happens because I'm too busy trying to manage my life in what appears to be an organized fashion. And because I've become complacent, or arrogant, or just plain blinded by Satan's creeping ways, I haven't given God the sovereignty he deserves in my life.
So late tonight as I stepped out of the shower, I realized - Grace is a completely unmerited favor of forgiveness- kind of like a winning ticket to the lottery you never bought but was handed to by a stranger. You didn't deserve it, but someone very special wants you to have it. So like a high school teacher with an unruly teen student, God patiently waited until I was willing to listen, and he gave me the answer I needed.
He doesn't want just the Sunday part of me. He wants all the controls, all the time. And I can't drive from the passenger seat...
6 comments:
Amen! Amen!
Sometimes...what's great about not knowing what to write about is that we get to meditate on the foundational truths--no agenda, no personal brilliance--just the Lord ministry his truth to our hearts.
Boy I have a hard time relinquishing the driver's seat. Thanks for your post. I really really needed it. :)
Noelle-I screwed up on the code for the button. I'm sorry. I changed the code on my post; it's correct now. Sorry for the inconvenience!
'Trust in the Lord with all your heart' was the first memory verse I learned but I agree we have to let go of our control for that to happen. Thank God for his grace hey.
Being 8 months pregnant, I'm face-to-face with the reality of NOT being in control...my 3 kiddos are running whirlwind circles around me as I struggle to get through the day! :) I appreciate you sharing honestly about what God is teaching you. Blessings to you this week!
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